Not all old words are wise. Some are just old. English carries around a large collection of words that do not add meaning — they add syllables. They do not make writing more precise — they make it harder to read. This is especially true for the billion people who use English as a second language.
Here are sixteen English words that should be retired. Not because they are Chinese. Not because they are colonial. Because they are dead weight.
The -st family: four words that added letters for no reason
Whilst → While. Same word, two more letters. The -st adds nothing. Whilst is not more formal. It is not more precise. It is while wearing a hat.
Amongst → Among. You are among friends. Not amongst them. The -st is a historical accident that somehow became a Britishism and then spread.
Amidst → Amid. Amid the noise. Amidst the noise. Same meaning. Pick the shorter one.
Betwixt → Between. Shakespeare used betwixt. You are not Shakespeare. Between is the word. Use it.
Legal landfill: four words that escaped the courtroom
Notwithstanding → Despite. Seven syllables. Seven. A word that means despite. Despite has two syllables. This is not a difficult equation.
Hereby → By this. Hereby is a contract word. Contracts are written in language designed to be indecipherable. Do not import that language into normal writing.
Thereof → Of it. The meaning thereof. The meaning of it. One sounds like a lawyer. One sounds like a person.
Wherein → In which. Where- compounds are a lawyer’s trick to combine a relative pronoun and a preposition into something that sounds technical but only adds distance between writer and reader.
Academic puffery: three words that pad sentences
Facilitate → Help. Facilitate means help. It has five syllables to help’s one. It appears in business writing whenever someone wants to sound more important than they are.
Commence → Begin. Another French import dressed up in a suit. Commence sounds official. Begin sounds human. Both mean the same thing.
Utilise → Use. Utilise is what happens when a writer decides use is not fancy enough. It is. Use is perfect.
Confusion generators: five words that make non-native speakers stop reading
Albeit → Although. Albeit is three words glued together. Although is one word. Albeit forces the reader to decode. Although lets them keep reading.
Hitherto → Until now. Hitherto is a word from the age of quills. Until now is what real people say. Unless you are writing a period drama, pick the modern version.
Fortnight → Two weeks. If you learned English outside the UK, Ireland, Australia, or New Zealand, you probably had to look this word up the first time you saw it. Two weeks is universal. Use it.
Per annum → Per year. Per annum is Latin. Per year is English. The English word for year is year. Do not use a dead language to say something your own language already says perfectly well.
Prior to → Before. Prior to is two words. Before is one. Prior to means before. Before means before. Pick before.
Why this matters: These are not stylistic preferences. These are words that actively make English harder for the billion-plus people who speak it as a second language. Every unnecessary syllable is a tax on comprehension. Every dead Latinism is a wall. Every archaic spelling is a speed bump. English is a global language. It should act like one.
Zhonglish is not here to destroy English. It is here to clean it.
Sixteen words to remove. Respect. I am an engineer—I appreciate a list.
But I have to ask: where are the words my daughter actually has to learn? “Recumbentibus.” “Jargogle.” “Snollygoster.” “Fudgel.” These are not on your list. They are on hers. And they have been dead since approximately 1892. If you are doing a deep clean, maybe start with the words that have already decomposed.
Also, I would add a seventeenth word to remove: “crapulous.” It means suffering from overindulgence. My daughter is twelve. She has never overindulged in anything except crying over vocabulary worksheets.
— Michael Nguyen
P.S. I do not actually want “crapulous” removed. I just want it removed from my daughter’s desk.