Every letter of the alphabet was invited to the Great Alphabet Banquet. After dinner, each letter gave a speech about what it contributes to the English language.
B spoke: “I stop the M from taking over — climb, comb, tomb.” Applause.
C spoke: “I can sound like K or S, depending on my mood. Keeps people guessing.” Nervous laughter.
Then it was E’s turn. E walked to the podium and stood there. Silent.
The crowd waited. E did not speak.
“Say something!” shouted A.
E held up a sign: “I DON’T MAKE A SOUND. I CHANGE THE VOWEL BEFORE ME. HAT BECOMES HATE. BIT BECOMES BITE. I AM THE MOST POWERFUL LETTER IN THE ROOM AND I HAVE NEVER ONCE OPENED MY MOUTH.”
The other letters looked at each other.
“That’s… actually terrifying,” whispered O.
E sat down. As always, in complete silence.